I ended up trading my ps4 controller with a friend that had one that came with her console. Kinda sucked because I really liked the Electric Purple color but I'd rather have a working wireless controller than one that's just a paperweight. I wonder if Sony changed something slightly with their controllers that kept it from connecting to Raspberry OS. I guess this topic can be closed now since it's technically resolved.
It worked! Thanks a lot for your help. I updated all the packages and used bluetoothctl. I guess what I did is a very basic stuff but maybe it helps to someone else so I will write down all the commands here.
sudo apt-get update
sudo apt-get upgrade
(now you should open your ds4's bluetooth mode and you will see it in the screen like [NEW] Device MAC_ID_OF_YOUR_DS4 Wireless Controller)
With pcsx-rearmed you can press escape and the menu is black with white monowidth font.
The lr-pcsx-rearmed is retroarch and has a colored menu gui.
I would try installing and trying the other of which you haven't tried.
If it is pcsx-rearmed then the controls will still need to be mapped. Navigating the menu to do this I think is possible with the controller but perhaps easier with the keyboard, as well the escape button needs to be pressed. In the controls menu, assign the buttons, if you press left and right on this screen it will show you Keyboard/Joystick/All binds. And don't forget to save the config when you're done.
You could also try installing the alternate driver, for sixaxis/playstation. The sixaxis helper driver is newer and allows other controllers to sync and use bluetooth.
Actually, in both cases you'd need an external tool. I use xboxdrv, as outlined in the guide I linked to above. Having analog movement available on the stick comes in handy for everything from 'Marble Madness' to 'Spy Hunter'. It's especially nice in 'Centipede', where you're normally all over the place much too quickly with digital controls.
@dankcushions O thanks that's very helpful. I really had my eyes set on the ps1 styled 20th anniversary ds4 controller, but that color layout is only available as a V1..so that could still be an option. (I prefer wired.)